A second blog today. I wanted to continue my thoughts about how we humans think.

A Picture is Worth a Thousand Words

I am learning that somatic meditations are helping me to find a balance. For this I have a wonderful group with other wonderful friends. I now have peace of mind. And I have another way to let go of the things that hurt or anger me, the things that are not about me or stem from other people’s mindsets which I cannot affect. Mediation is simple sitting quietly, emptying your mind which seems hard at first. Its telling the brain to stop and practicing the focusing on nothing, and allowing ones self to be present with self. Then comes the colors, for me it is Indigo Blue or Purple dark to light.

When dealing with others I tend “to play baseball” meaning I will communicate my thoughts in the present and at the time, then if those thoughts are not clear enough for the other person. Or they have another belief about the situation. I may choose to be more elaborate if it seems warranted setting a boundary. There should not be a third time if I have been clear about what part I do own.

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More Thoughts

I am thinking about when we say no to someone. Often when we say “No” we find it hard because we wish to please people or when we feel that “well, maybe___.” Usually there is disappointment after giving in to something, and it really isn’t happening as you would like to see it. Someone may still not be getting it by staying firm with how they see it. This hurts when it feels like untruth and your seen in a “bad light”. We should care about how we are seen, and if we carry ourselves in good ways, it is difficult and trying to understand what it’s all about is natural to head towards. However, sometimes the other person is seen as not willing to let go or understand. When there is nothing, we can do to change someone’s opinion about us then all we can do is turn aside and let go. Spending a lifetime where you’re trying to change someone else’s mind about you is fruitless. During the aftermath of the divorce from my first husband, I wasted a lot of time by feeling the pain and anger from that marriage. The biggest hurt was what happened regarding our children.

I was caught up in a thinking cycle due to my thoughts, and my brain was not very helpful! It kept reminding me of the pain and hurt. Understanding things intellectually did not help either. In time I began to see things differently. I did not have a foundation to fall back on or a belief in myself that was firmly established. I ran on my emotional self. This is what the brain was familiar with.

That version of me has evolved. That took time. As for the ex he could not help to evolve too. He did what he did and said what he said that hurt. He is responsible for his words and actions like I am. I am not privy to what he learned from our experience. What helped me was remembering he was a person. We did choose to marry. There were things I liked about him. And there were things I thought would change because of who I was. I had invested in the relationship but was disappointed as there was a lack of time on his end to even think. All he did was work. It was not that I did not appreciate his hard work. It was that for who I am being a farmwife did not work. There was no time for me. He was as frustrated as me at the lack of time but without a livelihood life would not be good either. It would have taken understanding how to change things up for an “us” and wanting to do it. It would have needed like-mindedness.

His mindset led him into being abusive due to his anger, hurt and frustration, his personality. Knowing that does not make him less accountable. But in a family unit this is where two people come together and make a commitment to each other. The responsibility is towards that initial relationship. Before ending things, I applied a new direct approach with him. I was clear about my feelings for one thing about how he made me feel. Then I let go after giving him the chance to respond. Interpersonal communication is key to a relationship but one cannot forget there are two mindsets, two brains involved making suggestion according to what is believed by the individuals involved. This is where the trouble starts.

We have our brains predicting what we think the trues reality is, then along comes friends and family who have empathy and sympathy on their part yet should not be involved as they often get. They add to the confusion, the hurt and anger with their efforts. “She’s a bitch! He’s a Bastard” Scenarios do not help. Once these two people felt they loved one another. What the brain does is it files away this kind of influence because it feels right. It is not the same interment understanding between the two people anymore. Hurt and anger makes people not want to talk with one another and it’s easier to talk to others but that becomes a problem that often grows into side taking and more hurt anger and blame.

Now a jump into the rest of the world. All that is happening out there! It’s people not being responsible for their own words and actions. Some blindly follow what seems right or perhaps easy to follow than take the time to think about what the bottom line really is. If you ask the question about who someone is when you take away their position regarding what they do. You need to trust what your intuition is telling you. You need to take your jump robe up and go back to home base. Think about how to create the home base without bringing that person or persons into that solid foundation to generate cracks.

The world, we people live in is a world where the foundations we build upon are based on the concept of propaganda even within relationships. Selling ideas which we don’t have to buy into by blindly following or thinking that sounds right is not away to go. Or by selling who we are to others when we really don’t know full who we are. The idea is to attract others to us no matter who or how they are. When I had a propaganda class, I learned how to think about selling ideas for products. Later I noticed that people began doing the same kind of thing regarding themselves. It was not a big step as they were doing it as businesspeople, it just became a way of being with the goal of acceptance in mind. This is the me I want you to see! I have wondered about ” Have I done this same thing?” We do is the answer, birds when courting do, other animals put their best feet forward so to speak. But selling oneself to others on the level of being grandiose, and with embellishments is not the same, it’s not the real person.

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Pejj Nunes 6/1/2026