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My honey! I love his “thumbs up!” Means I am doing ok! LOL!

I am ok. More than ok mostly, despite what happens around me. I can’t become too tired to try, no one should get to that point because living life well is so worth it, even when there are low points that do bring people down. It’s a matter of how you think about things. Do you own it? Or is it something done to you or in some way affecting your life? We can’t take on the world, but we can affect the world local to us. We can affect how we think, and what we think about. Knowing how the brain works helps. Understanding that thoughts are just that thoughts, and they range from very good to very bad! LOL That aspect does not feel very good at all! The thing is we know both good and bad things, and that is why we know the components of each of these emotional components of living. We all want the good without the bad.

The thing is we can control what we do, and not what others do or think. That’s a given. So, do think about what you want your own life to be like. Take control of your thinking by changing the subject to think about good things, things you can make happen. Letting go of what is bad who ever belongs to that experience, they own it as long as you remove yourself from it. Trying to prove right or wrong won’t help if someone does not see clearly what they have initiated by what they feel the reality is.

Change does not happen until someone sees the need for that change in thinking.

When things are “bad” we want to fix it. We want life to feel better. We want to remove the things that hurt deeply, and we want to understand why. It is one sided however and nothing is solvable when things are one sided.

We humans are certainly affected by one another. This said there are other ways of looking at things. If you look at what has happened outside of yourself. As if your above it and examining the experience. You can see things more clearly. It seems this means taking away the emotional attachment to what was experienced. It’s looking at something as if it were someone else. Somehow things seem more evident when it is someone else. Then one can ask, how would I advise another about this? The answer comes from intuition, instinct, the higher self. It needs to come from self-love too. This examination of experiences. What’s familiar about it? Have I ever felt this way to know what this might be about? Are there things I can understand? The trick is not to over think these thoughts but acknowledge the likelihood that this is my gut feeling on this. Such thoughts are not meant to take away the accountability of the relationship. Within a family there are several relationships to be built upon. The couple, who become the parents and each parent’s relationship to each child, then adult. The relationship is built on as it is according to the people in it, over time. It is built with trust and respect and resulting love if done well. There is accountability involved. Being accountable is important to having a good relationship. However, things do get wonky. And we ask why? We are compelled to understand.

I think that what happens is people do not think about how they are accountable within relationships. If someone is to respect and trust in you then how you are, what you say and do matters. The problem then is that not all people spend time with thinking about their relationships. The strength of their love, how to show love and compassion towards others. There is a lack of time to think, to become, to live life as one wants life to be.

People push away other people because life itself feels too much! People come to feel like other people are too much. And they stack up reasons why they feel as they do because they want a bottom line, a standpoint to start from. People become overwhelmed. I think people who ghost others feel this way.

I think of the time it takes me to solve things about myself. Too much time was spent on solving the who I am, and what I want to be. Instead, I have learned to “just to it!” Don’t waste time with over thinking what I want to do. Don’t be the only one trying to solve something. Especially if you don’t own it!

You cannot live well and make anyone your entire world. Because if they die, poof there you are! The problem solving is up to you, and there are a lot of problems at times. Tending and weeding the garden well, means tending it if it is to be beautiful. A garden needs what it does to survive. It needs to be loved, cherished and seen for its beauty. It’s a place which draws people in. Yet not all people spend time to exploring gardens, their lives are too much, too busy, etc. That is them. Find your own garden paths to follow. There is richness and beauty there to be found. There are others whose lives you can enrich by being all you are. It may not be what you thought but you can make a difference with others and that makes life very good. Pivot and find a richer life than staying in what is sad, hurtful and generates anger____ that makes less of life for you. Thumbs up! Tom! Thumbs up! I am good! I am me after all!

Best wishes! Pejj